Feeling Out of Control?

Here’s Why DBT Might Be What You Need!

Have you ever felt like your emotions are running the show—like you’re on a roller coaster that won’t slow down?

Maybe you say things you regret in the heat of the moment. Or shut down completely when emotions get too big. Maybe your relationships are intense, your moods unpredictable, and no matter how hard you try, it feels like too much, too fast, too often.

If this sounds familiar, you may be struggling with undercontrolled coping—and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) could be exactly what you need.

What Is Undercontrolled Coping?

Undercontrolled coping is a pattern where emotions and impulses feel overwhelming or hard to manage. It’s often linked to:

  • – Intense mood swings
  • – Difficulty tolerating distress
  • – Impulsive behaviors (like self-harm, binge eating, substance use)
  • – Struggles with identity or unstable relationships
  • – Feeling emotionally vulnerable or misunderstood

You might be incredibly sensitive and deeply caring—but when things go wrong, your reactions feel “too big” or “too much.” And that’s not because you’re weak—it’s because no one ever gave you the skills to handle emotions this powerful.

What Is DBT, and Why Does It Work?

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) was developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan to help people who experience chronic emotional dysregulation. It’s especially effective for those with borderline personality disorder, but it’s also been shown to help people dealing with depression, anxiety, PTSD, eating disorders, and more.

DBT is all about teaching you how to feel your emotions without being ruled by them. It combines acceptance (you are doing the best you can) and change (you can learn new ways to cope).

It’s not about “fixing” you—it’s about empowering you with skills to build a life that actually feels worth living.

4 Core Skill Areas of DBT (That Can Change Your Life)

  1. Mindfulness
    Learn to be present in the moment—without judgment. This is the foundation for all other skills. Mindfulness helps you slow down, notice your patterns, and respond instead of react.
  2. Distress Tolerance
    These skills help you survive emotional crises without making things worse. Instead of spiraling or acting impulsively, you’ll learn ways to ride out the storm safely.
  3. Emotion Regulation
    Emotions don’t have to be the enemy. DBT teaches you how to identify, understand, and manage your feelings before they overwhelm you.
  4. Interpersonal Effectiveness
    Learn how to ask for what you need, set boundaries, and maintain relationships—without exploding or shutting down.

Why DBT Is Different

✅ It’s skills-based. DBT gives you a toolbox you can use in real time—not just “talk therapy.”
✅ It balances acceptance and change. You’ll learn to validate your pain and take steps toward healing.
✅ It’s structured. Weekly skills groups, individual therapy, and phone coaching create a strong support system.
✅ It works. DBT is backed by decades of research and used in hospitals, outpatient programs, and even schools.

Who Should Consider DBT?

You don’t have to hit “rock bottom” to benefit from DBT. It can help if you:

  • – Feel overwhelmed by your emotions
  • – Struggle with impulsive behaviors
  • – Experience extreme highs and lows
  • – Have unstable or intense relationships
  • – Feel like you “overreact” or can’t calm down
  • – Want better coping skills but don’t know where to start

Final Thoughts: You’re Not Broken—You’re Underskilled

Here’s the truth: no one teaches us how to handle intense emotions. If you’ve been coping through shutdowns, outbursts, self-harm, or numbing—those were the best tools you had at the time.

DBT doesn’t judge you for that. It simply says: Let’s find new tools together.

You are not “too much.” You are not hopeless. You just need a map, and DBT might be it.

Want to learn more about starting DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Why Stabilisation Comes First – How DBT Can Help You Get There!

In the world of mental health and healing, we often focus on the so called big work—processing trauma, confronting deep-seated fears, or changing lifelong patterns. But here’s a truth that’s often overlooked:

Before you can go deep, you have to get stable!

Think of it like building a house. You wouldn’t start hanging artwork before the foundation is poured, right? Emotional and psychological healing is no different. And when it comes to building that foundation, Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) is one of the most effective toolkits we have.

What Does “Stabilisation” Really Mean?

Stabilisation is about creating a sense of safety, structure, and emotional steadiness in your daily life. It doesn’t mean life is perfect or pain-free— it means you have enough tools and support to handle distress without falling apart.

Signs you might need stabilisation:

  • – You’re frequently overwhelmed by your emotions
  • – You’re using harmful coping strategies (e.g., self-harm, substance use)
  • – You feel constantly on edge or unsafe in your own body
  • – You struggle with impulsivity, mood swings, or shutting down
  • – Your relationships feel chaotic or unstable
  • – Therapy feels too intense or re-traumatizing

In short, if life feels like you’re constantly putting out fires, your nervous system needs a chance to breathe before doing deeper emotional work.

Why DBT Is the Gold Standard for Stabilisation

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) was created specifically to help people build stability before diving into the emotional deep end. Originally developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan for individuals with intense emotional dysregulation, DBT is now widely used for anyone who struggles with self-destructive behaviors, trauma, or chaotic relationships.

DBT is practical. Structured. Evidence-based. And for many individuals DBT works.

The 4 DBT Skill Areas That Support Stabilisation

🧘 1. Mindfulness: Learning to Stay Present

When emotions feel like tidal waves, mindfulness is your anchor. DBT teaches you how to observe what’s happening inside and around you without judgment—so you can slow down, notice your urges, and make wise choices instead of reacting impulsively.

Mindfulness = hitting pause instead of panic.

🛑 2. Distress Tolerance: Surviving the Storm

These are your crisis tools—the ones you reach for when things feel out of control. Instead of self-harming, exploding, or numbing out, DBT gives you short-term strategies to ride out the intensity.

Skills like:

  • – Using ice or cold water to shock your system into calm
  • – Distracting with healthy alternatives
  • – Self-soothing through your senses
  • – Radical acceptance of what you can’t control

Distress tolerance helps you survive moments that used to break you.

❤️‍🔥 3. Emotion Regulation: Managing the Heat

It’s not about turning off your feelings—it’s about turning down the volume when things get too loud. DBT helps you:

  • – Understand what emotions you’re feeling (and why)
  • – Reduce your vulnerability to emotional chaos
  • – Increase positive experiences
  • – Build a life that feels more balanced overall

Regulation is the thermostat—so you don’t swing from freezing to boiling.

💬 4. Interpersonal Effectiveness: Navigating Relationships

Chaos in relationships can destabilize your whole world. DBT teaches you how to:

  • – Ask for what you need
  • – Set boundaries
  • – Say no without guilt
  • – Resolve conflict without blowing up or shutting down

Stable relationships = a more stable you.

Stabilisation Isn’t Stagnation—It’s Preparation

Sometimes people worry that focusing on stabilisation means avoiding “the real work” of therapy. The truth is: stability is the real work—especially if your nervous system has been living in survival mode for years.

Stabilization gives you the emotional bandwidth to:

  • – Be curious instead of defensive
  • – Engage in trauma work safely
  • – Reflect rather than react
  • – Build long-term change, not just crisis recovery

And once you’re stable, the deeper healing becomes less terrifying and more empowering.

Final Thoughts about a Solid Foundation

If life has felt like a constant emergency, or if therapy has felt overwhelming or unhelpful, maybe it’s not that you’re “too broken”—maybe it’s just that you haven’t been given the tools to stabilise yet.

DBT doesn’t promise perfection. It does however offer a roadmap toward emotional safety, clarity, and control. It’s not easy work—but it’s steady, supportive, and life-changing.

So if you’re ready to stop spiraling and start stabilizing, maybe it’s time to give DBT a real chance.

Want to learn more about starting DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/