Online Therapy: Flexible, Evidence‑Based Support for Individuals

The way people access mental health support has changed dramatically in recent years. Online therapy is no longer a second‑best option—it is a highly effective, evidence‑based way for individuals to engage in meaningful psychological treatment. When delivered using structured approaches such as Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and Radically Open Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (RO‑DBT), online therapy can be both powerful and accessible.


Importantly, therapy is not something that happens to individuals; it is something individuals actively engage in, learn from, and apply in their daily lives. Online DBT and RO‑DBT sessions honour this collaborative, skills‑based process.


What Are DBT and RO‑DBT?

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) is a structured, skills‑based therapy originally developed to support individuals who experience intense emotions, difficulty regulating behaviour, and challenges in relationships. DBT focuses on building practical skills in:

  • – Emotion regulation

  • – Distress tolerance

  • – Interpersonal effectiveness

  • – Mindfulness


Radically Open DBT (RO‑DBT) is designed for individuals who tend toward emotional over‑control. This can include people who are highly self‑disciplined, perfectionistic, socially withdrawn, or emotionally inhibited. RO‑DBT focuses on:

  • – Increasing openness and flexibility

  • – Strengthening social connection and emotional expression

  • – Reducing rigid coping styles

  • – Building a life guided by values and meaningful relationships


Both approaches are grounded in neuroscience, behavioural science, and compassion‑focused principles.


Why Online Therapy Works

Research and clinical experience consistently show that DBT and RO‑DBT translate exceptionally well to online formats. For many individuals, online therapy actually enhances engagement rather than reducing it.


Key reasons include:

  • – Structure and clarity: DBT‑based approaches follow clear session structures, skills frameworks, and goals, which adapt well to telehealth.

  • – Skills practice in real life: Individuals can apply skills immediately in their home environment and reflect on real‑world challenges during sessions.

  • – Consistency of care: Online delivery reduces cancellations related to travel, health, or time constraints.


Benefits of Online DBT and RO‑DBT for Individuals


1. Accessibility and Convenience

Online therapy removes geographical barriers. Individuals can access specialist DBT or RO‑DBT support regardless of location, which is particularly valuable in regional, rural, or international settings.


2. Reduced Anxiety and Increased Comfort

Many individuals feel more at ease engaging in therapy from their own space. This can reduce initial anxiety and support more open discussion, particularly for those who struggle with emotional expression or social threat sensitivity.


3. Flexible and Individualised Care

Online therapy allows sessions to be tailored to the individual’s needs, pace, and goals. Therapists can integrate individual therapy, skills coaching, and between‑session practice in a way that fits real‑life demands.


4. Empowerment Through Skill Development

DBT and RO‑DBT emphasise learning and practicing skills rather than focusing solely on symptoms. Individuals gain tools they can use long after therapy ends, supporting autonomy and long‑term resilience.


5. Continuity During Life Transitions

Online therapy supports continuity of care during travel, relocation, work changes, or health disruptions—helping individuals stay connected to therapy during periods of transition.


Respecting Individuals, Not Labels

Using the term individuals rather than patients reflects a core value of DBT and RO‑DBT: people are active participants in change, not passive recipients of treatment. Therapy is a collaborative process that recognises strengths, values, and lived experience.


Online DBT and RO‑DBT reinforce this philosophy by:

  • – Encouraging shared decision‑making

  • – Emphasising personal goals and values

  • – Supporting individuals to generalise skills into everyday life

Is Online DBT or RO‑DBT Right for You?

Online DBT and RO‑DBT may be particularly helpful for individuals who:

  • Experience emotional intensity or emotional over‑control

  • – Want practical, skills‑based support

  • – Value structure alongside compassion

  • – Need flexible access to therapy

  • – Are seeking deeper connection, balance, and psychological wellbeing


A qualified clinician can help determine which approach best fits an individual’s needs.


Final Thoughts

Online therapy using DBT and RO‑DBT is not a compromise—it is a modern, effective, and empowering way for individuals to engage in meaningful psychological support. By combining evidence‑based frameworks with accessibility and flexibility, online therapy supports real change in real life.


When therapy respects individuals as capable, resilient, and active in their own growth, the outcomes can be profound—no matter where the therapy takes place.



Want to learn more about starting DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

RO DBT & DBT Retreats in Phuket

Evidence-Based Therapy, Nervous System Safety, and Real-World Integration

Phuket has long been a place people travel to rest and reset—but our RO DBT and DBT retreats are designed for something deeper: structured psychological change, stabilisation, and skills integration, grounded in contemporary evidence-based practice.

Whether you are an individual seeking meaningful therapeutic growth or a mental-health professional wanting immersive CPD, our retreats blend clinical integrity, trauma-informed care, and intentional retreat design—all within a setting that naturally supports nervous system regulation.

Why a DBT & RO DBT Retreat?

Traditional therapy happens in short weekly sessions. Retreats allow something different—and powerful—to occur:

  • – sustained skills practice across consecutive days
  • – reduced environmental stressors
  • – real-time coaching and integration
  • – space for reflection, rest, and consolidation

Our retreats are not therapy holidays. They are structured, clinically informed programs that respect boundaries, safety, and scope—while offering depth that weekly sessions often can’t.

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT): Skills for Stability and Change

DBT is a gold-standard, evidence-based approach for emotion dysregulation, chronic stress, relationship difficulties, and trauma-related patterns.

In our DBT retreats, participants work with:

  • – emotion regulation skills
  • – distress tolerance and crisis survival strategies
  • – interpersonal effectiveness
  • – mindfulness and attention training
  • values-guided behavioural change

All content is delivered with a trauma-informed lens, recognising the role of threat systems, attachment patterns, and nervous system sensitivity.

The emphasis is always on practical application—how skills are used in daily life, not just understood intellectually.

Radically Open DBT (RO DBT): For Overcontrol, Loneliness, and Rigidity

RO DBT is specifically designed for individuals who struggle with overcontrol—including perfectionism, emotional inhibition, chronic loneliness, and excessive self-discipline.

Our RO DBT retreats focus on:

  • – increasing openness, flexibility, and social signalling
  • – reducing rigid coping strategies
  • – cultivating authentic connection
  • – working with shame, threat sensitivity, and social safety

RO DBT is particularly helpful for:

  • – professionals and high achievers
  • – individuals who “function well” but feel disconnected
  • – those who have tried other therapies without lasting relational change

The retreat format allows participants to practice openness in real time, within carefully structured and psychologically safe conditions.

Trauma-Informed by Design (Not Just in Theory)

Trauma-informed care is not a module—it is how the retreat is run.

Across all DBT and RO DBT retreats, we prioritise:

  • – choice and consent (participants may opt out of any exercise)
  • – predictable structure (clear schedules, expectations, and pacing)
  • – nervous system regulation (grounding, orienting, and stabilisation woven throughout)
  • – no pressure to disclose (learning never depends on personal revelation)

This creates a container where growth happens within the window of tolerance, not through overwhelm.

A Setting That Supports Regulation

Phuket offers more than scenery—it provides an environment that naturally supports recovery and learning.

Our retreats are hosted in quiet, thoughtfully chosen locations with:

  • – access to nature and fresh air
  • – low sensory load
  • – comfortable learning spaces
  • – opportunities for movement, rest, and reflection

The environment is intentionally aligned with DBT principles: effective, balanced, and humane.

For Individuals and Mental-Health Professionals

We offer different retreat streams depending on focus and audience.

Individual Retreats

Designed for adults seeking:

  • – emotional stability
  • – improved relationships
  • – trauma-informed skills
  • – meaningful personal change

These retreats are educational and skills-focused, not therapy or crisis treatment, and are suitable for individuals who are psychologically stable enough to engage in group learning.

Professional CPD Retreats

Designed for clinicians who want:

  • – immersive DBT or RO DBT learning
  • – trauma-informed adaptations for real-world practice
  • – embodied understanding of the model
  • – CPD hours in a restorative format

Professional retreats include explicit links to clinical application, therapist self-regulation, and ethical practice.

What Makes Our Retreats Different

Participants consistently tell us that what stands out is:

  • – clinical depth without intensity overload
  • – structure that creates safety rather than rigidity
  • – respect for professional and personal boundaries
  • integration of stabilisation, DBT, and RO DBT
  • – a pace that allows learning to land

This is not about dramatic breakthroughs—it’s about sustainable change.

After the Retreat: Integration and Support

Real change happens after you return home. Our retreats therefore include:

  • – guided reflection and consolidation
  • – values-based action planning
  • – optional follow-up resources or online materials
  • – clear guidance on how to continue practice safely

Participants leave with skills they can use, not just insights they felt.

A Thoughtful Invitation

Our RO DBT and DBT retreats in Phuket are for people who want evidence-based care delivered with humanity—for individuals and professionals who value structure and compassion, acceptance and change.

If you are looking for a retreat that is grounded, ethical, and genuinely transformative—without being overwhelming—we warmly invite you to explore our upcoming programs.

Places are intentionally limited to preserve safety, learning quality, and group cohesion.

Want to learn more about our DBT and RO DBT Retreats? We have programs commencing four times a year in May, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact to go through the approach and retreat best for you!

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Social Connectedness, Intimacy, and Emotional Loneliness

Many individuals who rely on an overcontrolled coping style may appear outwardly capable, composed, and self‑sufficient. They often manage responsibilities well, maintain high standards, and value independence. Yet beneath this surface competence, there is frequently a quieter struggle—emotional loneliness. Radically Open Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (RO‑DBT) was developed in part to address this exact dilemma: how excessive self‑control, while once adaptive, can interfere with social connectedness and intimacy.

Understanding Emotional Loneliness in Overcontrol

Emotional loneliness is not simply about being alone. Many individuals with overcontrolled coping styles are surrounded by people—colleagues, family, acquaintances—yet still feel unseen, disconnected, or emotionally distant. This type of loneliness emerges when inner emotional experiences are consistently hidden, minimised, or tightly managed.

Over time, habits such as emotional inhibition, perfectionism, and reluctance to rely on others can limit opportunities for closeness. While these strategies may reduce vulnerability in the short term, they often increase isolation in the long term.

How Overcontrol Disrupts Connection

RO‑DBT views social connection as a biological need rather than a personal weakness. From this perspective, intimacy depends not only on what we say, but on the signals we send to others through facial expression, tone of voice, body posture, and emotional openness.

Individuals with overcontrolled coping styles may:

  • – Appear emotionally neutral or distant despite caring deeply
  • – Prioritise self‑reliance over mutual dependence
  • – Suppress emotional expression to avoid burdening others
  • – Rely on logic and problem‑solving at the expense of emotional sharing

These patterns can unintentionally signal disinterest or unavailability, even when the desire for closeness is strong.

RO‑DBT and the Science of Social Signalling

A central focus of RO‑DBT is social signalling—the subtle, often unconscious cues that shape how others experience us. Human connection is built through reciprocal signalling: warmth, openness, responsiveness, and emotional expression.

RO‑DBT helps individuals become more aware of how their internal experiences translate into external signals. Small shifts—such as softening facial expression, sharing a genuine emotional response, or tolerating moments of uncertainty—can dramatically change how safe and inviting others feel in connection.

Importantly, RO‑DBT does not aim to remove self‑control entirely. Instead, it helps individuals learn when control supports their values and when loosening control may foster deeper intimacy.

Re‑Learning Intimacy Through Openness

Intimacy requires risk. For individuals with overcontrolled coping styles, this risk often feels profound. Letting others see emotional needs, uncertainty, or vulnerability can activate fears of rejection, shame, or loss of control.

RO‑DBT supports individuals to practise gradual openness rather than dramatic disclosure. This may include:

  • – Sharing emotional experiences in real time
  • – Expressing preferences or needs directly
  • – Allowing others to influence thoughts or decisions
  • – Staying present with discomfort instead of withdrawing

Through repeated practice, individuals learn that openness often strengthens relationships rather than threatening them.

From Self‑Sufficiency to Shared Humanity

A key shift encouraged in RO‑DBT is moving from rigid self‑sufficiency toward interdependence. Healthy intimacy does not mean losing autonomy—it means allowing mutual influence, care, and emotional exchange.

As individuals reduce emotional masking and increase social signalling, many experience:

  • – Greater depth in relationships
  • – Increased sense of belonging
  • – Reduced emotional loneliness
  • – A felt sense of being known and accepted

Connection becomes something lived and embodied, not merely understood.

Emotional Loneliness Is Not a Personal Failure

RO‑DBT frames emotional loneliness as an understandable outcome of coping strategies that once helped individuals adapt, survive, or succeed. There is no blame in recognising that these strategies may no longer serve current relational needs.

By approaching connection with curiosity rather than self‑criticism, individuals can experiment with new ways of relating—ways that balance competence with warmth, and autonomy with closeness.

Final Thoughts

Social connectedness and intimacy are essential to psychological wellbeing. For individuals with overcontrolled coping styles, emotional loneliness is often not a lack of desire for connection, but a lack of learned pathways toward it.

Radically Open DBT offers a compassionate, science‑informed framework for reopening those pathways. Through increased awareness, flexible responding, and intentional openness, individuals can move toward richer, more satisfying relationships—where they are not only respected for what they do, but known for who they are.

Maybe it’s time to be radically open.

Curious about whether RO-DBT is right for you? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

DBT Retreats for Families

Strengthening Safety, Connection, and Skills—Together

Family life can feel overwhelming when emotions run high, communication breaks down, or stress and trauma shape everyday interactions. Our Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) Family Retreats are designed to support families to pause, stabilise, and rebuild skills together—in a way that is structured, compassionate, and genuinely practical.

Hosted in the tranquil surrounds of Phuket, our family DBT retreats combine evidence-based skills training with a setting that supports nervous system regulation, rest, and reconnection.

Why a DBT Retreat for Families?

Families often attend therapy in short weekly sessions, while real-life challenges unfold daily. A retreat offers something different:

  • – extended time to learn and practise DBT skills
  • – fewer external pressures and distractions
  • – opportunities to slow down reactive patterns
  • – space for shared reflection and repair

Our retreats are skills-based and psychoeducational, not family therapy intensives. The focus is on learning tools that families can use at home, rather than processing personal histories in a way that might feel unsafe or overwhelming.

What Families Learn

DBT is particularly well suited to family systems where emotions escalate quickly or feel hard to manage.

During the retreat, families learn and practise:

  • – emotion regulation skills to reduce reactivity and burnout
  • – distress tolerance strategies for high-stress moments
  • – mindfulness skills to slow interactions and increase awareness
  • – communication and validation skills that reduce conflict
  • – boundary-setting strategies that balance care and consistency

Skills are taught in clear, accessible language, with guided practice and real-life examples that families recognise immediately.

Trauma-Informed and Family-Sensitive

All family retreats are designed with a trauma-informed lens, recognising that families often carry cumulative stress, developmental trauma, or prolonged periods of crisis.

This means:

  • – predictable daily structure
  • – clear expectations and boundaries
  • – no pressure for disclosure or “sharing personal stories”
  • – choice and flexibility in participation
  • – regular grounding and regulation breaks

Safety—emotional and physical—is prioritised at every stage.

Accommodation Designed for Families

Families stay at the peaceful Patong Rai Rom Yen Resort, nestled away from the busier areas of Patong.

To support comfort, privacy, and rest, families can choose from:

  • – single rooms for individual family members
  • – or a two-bedroom, two-storey private house with a private plunge pool, ideal for families wanting shared space with the option to retreat and reset

This flexibility allows families to be together and have personal space—an essential balance for nervous system regulation and healthy interaction.

A Daily Rhythm That Supports Regulation

Each day follows a predictable, family-friendly structure:

  • – morning skills sessions
  • – breaks for rest, meals, or pool time
  • – short practice exercises rather than long lectures
  • – optional reflection activities
  • – afternoons and evenings free for family connection

This rhythm reduces overwhelm and helps families practise skills in real-world moments—during meals, downtime, or shared activities.

Not a Holiday — Not Exhausting Either

Our family DBT retreats are not therapy holidays; they are also not intensive clinical programs that leave families depleted.

The aim is:

  • – learning without overload
  • – structure without rigidity
  • – growth without pressure

Families often report leaving feeling more hopeful, more equipped, and more connected, rather than emotionally drained.

Who These Retreats Are For

Family DBT retreats are well suited for families who:

  • – experience frequent emotional escalation or conflict
  • – feel “stuck” in repeating patterns
  • – are navigating adolescent or young adult emotion dysregulation
  • – want practical tools rather than insight alone
  • – are stable enough to participate in group-based learning

They are not designed for families in acute crisis requiring immediate clinical intervention.

After the Retreat: Bringing Skills Home

Sustainable change happens after families return home. Each retreat therefore, focuses on:

  • – consolidating key skills
  • – identifying realistic next steps
  • – creating shared language around emotions and behaviour
  • – encouraging small, consistent changes rather than dramatic promises

Families leave with tools they can keep using, long after the retreat ends.

A Thoughtful Invitation

Our DBT Family Retreats in Phuket offer families a rare opportunity to step out of survival mode and into learning, stabilisation, and reconnection—within a calm, respectful, and evidence-based framework.

With thoughtfully designed accommodation, trauma-informed facilitation, and practical DBT skills, these retreats support families to move forward together—more regulated, more confident, and better equipped for everyday life.

Places are limited to preserve safety, learning quality, and a supportive group environment.

Want to learn more about our DBT and RO DBT Retreats? We have programs most of the year, depending on practitioner and accommodation availability. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact to go through the approach and retreat best for you!

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Cultivating Self-Care Through the Lens of DBT

Self-care is more than bubble baths and spa days—although those can be great, too. At its core, self-care is about recognising your needs and intentionally taking action to meet them. In Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), self-care is not only encouraged, it’s essential for building a life worth living.

DBT, developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan, was originally created to treat individuals with borderline personality disorder, but its tools and philosophies have proven helpful for anyone navigating intense emotions, relationship struggles, or just the chaos of everyday life. Here’s how you can apply DBT principles to create a self-care routine that is compassionate, balanced, and sustainable.

1. Mindfulness: The Foundation of Self-Awareness

DBT begins with mindfulness—the practice of being fully present in the moment without judgment. Mindfulness helps you notice when you’re overwhelmed, burned out, or ignoring your needs.

Try this: Set a daily check-in reminder. When it goes off, pause and ask yourself:

  • “How am I feeling emotionally and physically right now?”
  • “What do I need in this moment?”
  • By tuning in regularly, you’ll be more in touch with your emotional landscape and can respond before hitting the breaking point.

2. Distress Tolerance: Caring for Yourself When Things Get Tough

Sometimes, life throws curveballs that can’t be fixed right away. Distress Tolerance skills help you survive these moments without making things worse.

DBT skill to try: TIPP skills (Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing, and Progressive Muscle Relaxation). These fast-acting strategies help regulate your nervous system in high-stress moments.
For example, try splashing cold water on your face (Temperature) or doing 10 jumping jacks (Intense Exercise) to release built-up tension.

3. Emotion Regulation: Proactive Self-Care for Emotional Health

Emotion Regulation skills teach us how to understand and manage emotions before they become overwhelming. Self-care, in this context, means doing things that build emotional resilience.

DBT skill to try: PLEASE (treat PhysicaL illness, Eat balanced meals, avoid mood-Altering substances, get enough Sleep, and Exercise regularly). These might seem basic, but they’re powerful. Neglecting these areas can make us more emotionally vulnerable.

Think of PLEASE as the “baseline” of self-care. When your foundation is strong, you’re more capable of handling stress and uncertainty.

4. Interpersonal Effectiveness: Setting Boundaries as Self-Care

Sometimes, self-care means saying no, asking for help, or advocating for your needs. DBT’s Interpersonal Effectiveness skills give you tools to do this with clarity and confidence.

DBT skill to try: DEAR MAN (Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate). This structure helps you have tough conversations without sacrificing your self-respect or damaging relationships.

Example:
“I noticed I’ve been taking on a lot of extra work (Describe). I feel really overwhelmed and stressed (Express). I need to step back from this project for now (Assert). If I can focus on fewer tasks, I’ll be able to do a better job (Reinforce).”

5. Radical Acceptance: When Self-Care Means Letting Go

There are times when no amount of action can change a painful situation. That’s where Radical Acceptance comes in. It doesn’t mean approval or giving up—it means accepting reality as it is so you can stop fighting it and start moving forward.

Try this: When you find yourself resisting reality, pause and repeat:
“This is what’s happening right now. I may not like it, but I accept that it is real.”
Acceptance can be the most compassionate form of self-care there is.

Final Thoughts

Self-care isn’t a luxury; it’s a lifeline. With DBT as a guide, self-care becomes less about what you can do and more about what you need in order to live a balanced, meaningful life. Whether you’re soothing yourself in a moment of crisis, setting boundaries, or simply remembering to eat lunch, these acts of care are deeply radical—and deeply healing.

Want to learn more about starting DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Always in Control?

Here’s Why You Might Want to Try Radically Open DBT!

Let’s be honest—self-control is usually seen as a strength. Being responsible, disciplined, composed, thoughtful… what could be wrong with that?

But what if your incredible self-control is getting in the way of your happiness?

If you’re someone who:

  • – Has trouble opening up emotionally
  • – Feels isolated even around people you love
  • – Avoids conflict, spontaneity, or emotional “messiness”
  • – Lives by rigid rules or high standards
  • – Feels like you’re always “on” but never really seen

…then you may be experiencing what therapists call overcontrolled coping. And Radically Open Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (RO-DBT) might be the missing piece you’ve been looking for.

What Is Overcontrolled Coping?

Overcontrolled coping is a style of dealing with the world by tightening up—emotionally, behaviorally, socially. It’s often driven by deep fears of vulnerability, failure, or rejection. People with overcontrolled traits are often:

  • – Perfectionistic
  • – Highly self-reliant
  • – Emotionally restrained
  • – Rule-bound or risk-averse
  • – Sensitive to criticism or perceived rejection

On the surface, this can look like “having it all together.” But inside, it can feel like chronic loneliness, tension, exhaustion, and an aching desire for deeper connection—without knowing how to reach it.

So, What Is RO-DBT?

Radically Open DBT is a therapy specifically designed for people who cope through overcontrol. Unlike standard DBT (which helps people who struggle with emotional undercontrol), RO-DBT focuses on increasing openness, flexibility, and authentic social connection.

RO-DBT isn’t about telling you to “chill out” or “just relax.” It’s about helping you build the courage to:

  • – Let go of perfection
  • – Express your true emotions
  • – Take healthy social and emotional risks
  • – Connect with others in more vulnerable, fulfilling ways

Why RO-DBT Works for Overcontrolled People

  1. It sees your overcontrol not as a flaw—but as an adaptation.
    RO-DBT recognizes that traits like discipline, attention to detail, and emotional control likely served you well at some point. The goal isn’t to get rid of these strengths—it’s to loosen their grip so they don’t cost you relationships or joy.
  2. It teaches radical openness.
    This means being open to new experiences, feedback, and uncertainty. You learn to become more flexible—not by being forced into chaos, but by exploring how curiosity and playfulness can lead to connection and growth.
  3. It targets social signaling.
    RO-DBT teaches you how subtle behaviors—facial expressions, tone of voice, body language—can either invite connection or push people away. You’ll learn how to signal openness instead of emotional distance.
  4. It emphasizes genuine connection.
    The core of RO-DBT is about forming deep, authentic relationships—not through people-pleasing or surface-level interactions, but through vulnerability and shared experience.

Signs You Might Benefit from RO-DBT

  • – You often feel lonely, even if you’re surrounded by people.
  • – You hide your true emotions to avoid “burdening” others.
  • – You rely on rules, routines, or perfection to feel safe.
  • – You struggle to relax or have fun without guilt.
  • – You value control so much that change feels threatening.
  • – You crave connection—but keep people at arm’s length.

If you read that and felt seen—you’re not alone. Overcontrol can be an invisible prison, and RO-DBT can help you find the key.

What RO-DBT Looks Like

RO-DBT is structured, but a bit different from traditional therapies. It usually includes:

  • – Individual therapy sessions
  • – Skills class (like a course on radical openness and connection)
  • – Home practice to experiment with new ways of interacting and responding
  • – Optional phone coaching or support between sessions

The focus is less on emotional regulation and more on building openness, receptivity, and playfulness—especially in social situations.

Final Thoughts: Control Isn’t the Enemy—Disconnection Is

You don’t need to become a completely different person. You don’t need to lose your drive or stop being organized. RO-DBT isn’t about undoing who you are—it’s about unlocking the parts of you that got locked away in the name of control.

It’s about learning how to be real. How to risk connection. How to be seen—messy, beautiful, and human.

If you’re tired of doing everything “right” but still feeling disconnected, maybe it’s time to try something radically different.

Maybe it’s time to be radically open.

Curious about whether RO-DBT is right for you? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Thinking About Starting DBT?

Here’s How to Overcome the Hard Part: Beginning

Starting therapy can be hard. Starting Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)? That can feel like a whole other level. Maybe you’ve been told DBT could help you. Maybe you’ve done the research. Maybe this is your last hope after trying everything else.

But there’s a part of you that’s unsure—or even terrified—of taking that first step.

You’re not alone.

DBT is life-changing. But let’s be honest: it’s also challenging. Especially in the beginning. So let’s talk about it—why starting DBT can feel so tough, and how to push through when everything in you wants to avoid it.

1. “It Feels Like Too Much”

DBT can look intimidating from the outside. Weekly individual therapy, weekly skills groups, homework, tracking emotions, phone coaching—wait, what?

Yes, it’s structured. Yes, it requires effort. And yes—it can feel overwhelming at first.

Well… here’s the thing: That structure is what makes DBT work. If your emotions feel out of control, that structure is the safety net. The skills are bite-sized, learned week by week. You don’t have to do it all at once—you just have to start.

🟢 Small step: Tell yourself you only need to show up to the first session. That’s it. No commitment beyond that. Just one step at a time.

2. “I Don’t Know If It’ll Help Me”

If you’ve been through years of therapy and still feel like it is all too much, it’s normal to feel skeptical. DBT is often recommended to people who have tried everything else—and that can bring both hope and hopelessness.

But DBT is different because it teaches skills—real, practical tools for managing emotions, reducing impulsivity, and improving relationships. It’s not just talking about problems—it’s about building a toolkit to face them.

🟢 Small step: Watch a video or read a personal story from someone who’s completed DBT. Hearing how it helped others can build trust that it could help you too.

3. “I’m Scared of Feeling Exposed or Judged”

A full DBT approach involves group therapy (the skills class). For some, skills classes can feel terrifying if you’re used to hiding your emotions or feel ashamed of your past.

Here’s what you need to know: DBT groups aren’t group therapy in the traditional sense. They’re skills classes, more like a course than a therapy circle. You don’t have to share your deepest secrets. You learn together, and you get to choose how much or how little you share.

Also? Everyone in that room gets it. You’re not too much. You’re not the only one. You belong there.

🟢 Small step: Ask your therapist or provider what group looks like. Sometimes, just knowing what to expect helps reduce fear.

4. “What If I Fail at DBT?”

If you’re someone who already struggles with self-criticism or perfectionism, the idea of “failing” at therapy might feel like one more thing to get wrong.

But DBT expects individuals to struggle. In fact, one of its core assumptions is:
🌀 “People are doing the best they can—and they can do better with support.”

DBT therapists don’t expect perfection. They seek effort. If you forget to fill out your diary card or mess up a skill—good. That means you’re trying. That means you’re in it.

🟢 Small step: Shift your mindset from “I have to do this perfectly” to “I just have to keep showing up.” That’s how progress happens.

5. “I Don’t Think I Deserve to Get Better”

This one hits deep. If you’ve been in pain for a long time, there may be a part of you that believes healing isn’t for you. That you’re too broken, too complicated, too far gone.

Let me say this clearly:
💬 DBT was made for people who feel like they’re at the end of the road.
If you’re still breathing, there’s still a chance. And if no one has told you this before—you are allowed to heal. You are allowed to build a life worth living.

🟢 Small step: Try saying this to yourself—“Even if I don’t believe I deserve healing, I’m going to try anyway.” Let your actions lead the way.

Final Thoughts: The Hardest Part Is Starting—But That’s Where Everything Changes

Starting DBT means choosing to stop surviving and start learning. It means being willing to believe—just a little—that change is possible.

It won’t be easy. And you won’t be doing it alone.

So if you’re standing at the edge, wondering if you should take the leap—this is your sign.

🧠 You don’t have to feel ready.
🦶 You just have to take one step.
💬 And you can always ask for support along the way.

We all deserve the tools. We all deserve the stability. We all deserve the life that DBT can help you build.

Need help figuring out how to start DBT? Whether it’s finding a program, understanding the structure, or beginning DBT… our DBT Clinic team is available to support you access the most appropriate DBT program! We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

Radical Openness for the New Year!

Every January, millions of people make resolutions that sound a lot like this:

  • “Be more productive.”
  • “Stick to a strict routine.”
  • “Control my eating/spending/time better.”

Sound familiar?

If you tend toward perfectionism, rule-following, or emotional inhibition, these kinds of resolutions might feel natural—but also exhausting. That’s where Radically Open DBT (RO-DBT) offers a breath of fresh air. Instead of trying to tighten up, RO-DBT invites us to loosen up—to get curious, take social-emotional risks, and embrace the vulnerability that comes with being truly seen.

So this year, try flipping the script. Let’s make resolutions that focus on openness, flexibility, and joyful connection.

🎭 1. Be More Weird (On Purpose)

Traditional Resolution: “Be more professional/perfect/polished.”
RO-DBT Reframe: “Take more social-emotional risks—show my quirky, real self.”

Overcontrolled individuals often fear being judged or rejected, so they mask their true personality. RO-DBT teaches that expressing our uniqueness (even awkwardly!) builds real connection.

Resolution Idea:
Once a week, do something a little out of character on purpose—crack a silly joke, share an embarrassing story, or wear something that breaks your usual style rules. Let people see the real, imperfect, vibrant you.

🎲 2. Break a Rule (That Doesn’t Serve You)

Traditional Resolution: “Stick to my routines no matter what.”
RO-DBT Reframe: “Challenge one rigid rule I follow that might be limiting me.”

People with overcontrolled coping styles often have unspoken “shoulds” that govern everything—from how to load the dishwasher to how emotions should be expressed.

Resolution Idea:
Pick one internal rule that creates stress (e.g., “I must always be early,” or “I can’t relax until everything’s done”) and break it once a week—gently, playfully, mindfully.

💬 3. Speak Honestly (Even If It Feels Risky)

Traditional Resolution: “Keep the peace and avoid confrontation.”
RO-DBT Reframe: “Practice radical openness by sharing how I really feel.”

In RO-DBT, radical openness means being willing to share truths—not just opinions. This means expressing real feelings, preferences, or disappointments instead of bottling them up.

Resolution Idea:
Once a week, express something honest and vulnerable to someone close. It doesn’t have to be dramatic—it could be as simple as, “I’ve been feeling lonely lately,” or “I actually don’t love that restaurant.”

🌀 4. Let Go of the Plan (and Roll With It)

Traditional Resolution: “Stick to my schedule.”
RO-DBT Reframe: “Practice flexibility when life doesn’t go as planned.”

Overcontrolled folks often find comfort in planning—but life is messy, and growth lives in the unplanned. RO-DBT encourages us to approach change with curiosity, not fear.

Resolution Idea:
Create space each week for spontaneity. Say yes to a last-minute invite. Try something new without researching it first. Let someone else make the plan. Notice the discomfort—and do it anyway.

🫶 5. Make Time for Playful Connection

Traditional Resolution: “Strengthen relationships by being more helpful or responsible.”
RO-DBT Reframe: “Nurture connection through shared joy, not just duty.”

People high in overcontrol often focus on being useful, which can accidentally make relationships feel transactional. RO-DBT teaches that play, laughter, and mutual weirdness are the glue of true connection.

Resolution Idea:
Schedule one lighthearted social interaction each week. Watch a silly movie with a friend. Play a game. Dance around the kitchen. Laugh on purpose. Let go of the need to be productive in every interaction.

🌱 Final Thoughts: The Most Radical Resolution of All

In a world that praises hustle, control, and perfection, the most radical thing you can do is let yourself be real.

RO-DBT reminds us that authentic connection requires courage, playfulness, and openness to feedback. So this year, instead of striving to be better, try being braver. Not in the “face your fears” kind of way—but in the “show up as your whole self” kind of way.

Because maybe, just maybe, that’s the version of you the world’s been waiting to meet.

Want to learn more about starting RO-DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/

DBT-Inspired New Year’s Resolutions

Ah, New Year’s resolutions. Every January, we’re bombarded with messages to “be better,” “do more,” or “finally get it together.” But let’s be real: those all-or-nothing goals? They often lead to burnout by February.

Enter: DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy)—a skills-based approach that’s all about finding balance, managing emotions, and building a life worth living. Instead of aiming for perfection, DBT invites us to live more mindfully, regulate emotions effectively, and improve our relationships.

So this year, skip the shame-based resolutions and try these DBT-aligned goals instead.

🧘‍♀️ 1. Practice Mindfulness Over Perfection

Traditional Resolution: “I’ll be more productive every day.”
DBT-Inspired Upgrade: “I’ll practice mindfulness every day—even for 60 seconds.”

Mindfulness in DBT means staying present without judgment. You don’t have to meditate on a mountain. It could be as simple as mindfully brushing your teeth or eating a snack without scrolling your phone. It’s not about zoning out—it’s about tuning in.

Try this: Set a daily “pause” alarm. When it goes off, take 3 deep breaths and check in:
What am I feeling right now? What do I need?

💪 2. Build Emotional Resilience (One Healthy Habit at a Time)

Traditional Resolution: “I’m going to completely cut out sugar and go to the gym every day.”
DBT-Inspired Upgrade: “I’ll take care of my body so my emotions have a solid foundation.”

In DBT, the PLEASE skills remind us to care for our physical health to reduce emotional vulnerability. It’s not about weight loss or punishment—it’s about fueling your body and brain so you can handle life better.

DBT Goal Ideas:

  • Drink a full glass of water when you wake up.
  • Go for a 10-minute walk three times a week.
  • Go to bed 30 minutes earlier once a week.

Tiny changes can make a big emotional impact.

🔥 3. Respond to Stress Without Self-Destructing

Traditional Resolution: “I’ll stop freaking out when things go wrong.”
DBT-Inspired Upgrade: “When I’m overwhelmed, I’ll use Distress Tolerance skills before reacting.”

Life will get messy. DBT’s Distress Tolerance tools help you survive those moments without making things worse. It’s not about suppressing emotions—it’s about riding the wave until it passes.

Resolution idea: “When I’m triggered, I’ll pause and do one DBT skill before acting.”
Examples:

  • Splash cold water on your face (TIP skill).
  • Do a grounding 5-4-3-2-1 exercise.
  • Hold an ice cube when you’re overwhelmed.

🗣️ 4. Communicate Like a Boss (Even When It’s Hard)

Traditional Resolution: “I’m going to cut out all toxic people.”
DBT-Inspired Upgrade: “I’ll use DBT’s DEAR MAN skills to ask for what I need.”

Setting boundaries is self-care. But so is expressing needs with skill. DBT’s Interpersonal Effectiveness tools like DEAR MAN help you speak up with confidence and kindness.

Mini-resolution: Practice one assertive conversation a month using DEAR MAN:

  • Describe the situation
  • Express how you feel
  • Assert what you need
  • Reinforce why it matters
  • Stay Mindful, Appear confident, and be open to Negotiation

Example:
“I feel anxious when plans change last minute. Can we agree to give each other at least a few hours’ notice?”

🌿 5. Radically Accept What You Can’t Control

Traditional Resolution: “I’m going to stay positive no matter what!”
DBT-Inspired Upgrade: “I will practice radical acceptance when life is out of my control.”

Positivity is great—but sometimes, life just sucks. Radical Acceptance isn’t giving up; it’s choosing peace over resistance when things can’t be changed.

Resolution idea: When something feels unfair, painful, or unexpected, pause and say:
“This is what’s happening. I may not like it, but I accept that it’s real.”
That moment of acceptance can create space for healing.

🧠 Final Thoughts: Progress, Not Perfection

The magic of DBT is that it embraces the dialectic: two things can be true at once. You can want to change and accept where you are. You can struggle and still be trying your best. Your self-care doesn’t need to be aesthetic or Instagram-worthy—it just needs to be yours.

Want to learn more about starting DBT? We have programs commencing four times a year in February, April, July and October. Our individual therapists can usually see you within a week of your initial contact.

You can get in contact with our team via email to intake@dbtclinics.com or go to our appointments page for more options at https://dbtclinics.com/appointments/